Hello there, I’m Clark. Welcome (back?) to my site. On this post we are going to explore how to stop anger. I’m talking about the times when you got into a disagreement with someone, and the longer the conversation goes on you feel more and more anger welling up inside you, and you know, you know, that there’s going to be a fight on the next time you open your mouth.
React Less, Be Present
I found this to be really good advice. React less we can all understand. When two people are angry, the less reaction there is coming from any one of the two is going to help a lot to diffuse the situation. But we all know this is not easy to perform. Oftentimes, this will feel like losing to us, and that makes us even angrier. At those moments, all we want is to make the other person see how wrong they are.
So what can we do to diffuse our own anger? Bring our attention to the present moment. Be in the now. Instead of making our anger more acute as you would have thought that actually reduces our anger levels immediately. You may find yourself with clarity of mind, and is able to put forth your viewpoints without getting angry. And you might find yourself knowing that the other person is not listening to you at all at least in this moment and hence you decide not to say too much.
You can also do this when someone is complaining about something and you know that person is just venting because he or she has complained about that same thing for so many times! Or your friend is going on and on about his/her worry about this and that. When the other person is making himself or herself more and more worked up, just stay in the present moment and before long you may find that person cooling down as he/she realize that the situation is not as dire as he/she previously thought.
Sometimes, There Is Nothing We Can Do
Sometimes, we are not even aware that we are getting angry. Never mind, once the entire ordeal is over, you can have a moment of reflection on that episode. But don’t see it as a failure of some sort. Just reflect, and know that the next time such a thing happens again you’ll be better equipped to handle it.
Sometimes, we are aware of that anger, but we are too far gone to care or do anything about it. So just let it play out, and if possible try to have that awareness of being angry, the awareness that you are angry, even as you say your angry words. Being aware that you are feeling anger is already a good step forward compared to being unaware, and know that as you consciously practice being aware and being present more and more it will become easier and easier to not become angry.
Be Aware and Be Present
I can’t really explain why this works, but it does. Perhaps when we are present, there is less thinking, and hence there is more space for intuition and divine guidance to come to us. That is actually not as strange an idea as you might think. That will be all for today, if you have any questions/comments please leave them below, and until the next time, cheerio!
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