Good day my friends, and welcome back to this series! This is the sixth part of my “Love Series”, in which we will look at how to improve your relationship with others. I know there are plenty of such posts on the Internet already, so let me try to be unconventional with my suggestions here.
By the way, if you want to read the other parts of this series, please visit my Series page and look under “LOVE series” section.
Here’s the most recent part: Love Series #5
Listen Using This Method
I think this might be one of the most unconventional advice you’ve heard. It is recommended by Eckhart Tolle in his book The Power of Now. Let me try to elaborate. Under this method, you first go deep into your inner body. I’ve summarized what I understand about it here (look under “Go deep into your body as a portal” section).
Even after you’ve come out of your “feeling the energy field of your inner body” session, try to maintain a part of your attention on your inner body. Feel your inner body when someone you care about is speaking. It is said to be one of the most precious gifts you can give to someone you care about. When you listen in this way, you stop thought and truly listen to the other person. Most of the time you are paying more attention to your thoughts than to what the other person is saying. The book also claims that what really matters is feeling the Being of the other person by feeling your own Being. The word Being means the Un-manifested, or Source, or God, or the Universe, or whatever you wish to call it.
This might work better between couples… When your partner comes back from work after a long and busy day, what better way to cheer him/her up with a slow, sensual massage? Besides the appreciation you’d receive (probably) just for the thought alone, a massage relaxes and revitalizes the body and mind, and in some cases, it gets the other person in the mood for some more intimate ‘activities’. Going for a massage has always been one of my favorite activities!
There are many ways in which you could learn how to give a simple massage. You don’t have to be as good as the therapists in massage parlors. The most important component here is just a desire to make your partner feel good all over.
Try googling. Start with a neck, shoulder and/or back massage. If you really can’t discover anything, try rubbing your finger along a spot on your (or your partner’s) body that feels tense. Usually for me, the body parts on my back just below the shoulders feel really good when they are rubbed. It could be a different part of the body for you/your partner, and also on a different day it could be a different part of the body. Part of the fun is finding out.
Rather than telling your partner you’re giving him/her a massage, just go for it. Surprise your partner. You don’t have to schedule everything… Or go for a couples massage (where both of you are massaged side-by-side in a massage parlor). There are many ways you can proceed with this, and as long as you take this as a fun exercise I believe the ideas will flow.
And that is the sixth part of “Love Series”. I hope you’ve enjoyed it, and if you have, may I request you share it with family and friends? Remember to come back often and read my latest posts/articles, and of course, feel free to subscribe to my emails (you’ll get a free personal development book when you do). If you have any questions or comments, don’t hesitate to leave them below and I will get back to you ASAP. Thanks a lot!
Read next: Love Series #7